Review/ recenzija: Mats and Susan Billmark: Learn To Live: The Book That Can Change Your Life/ Nau�i �ivjeti: knjiga koja ti mo�e promijeniti �ivot
Recenzija na hrvatskom nalazi se ispod recenzije na engleskom ??
Are you a fan of self-help literature? Did you just roll your eyes after seing me ask the previous question? One more question: do you know what this term self-help even mean?
A lot of people feel threatened by this term, mostly because of the help part. People are afraid other people will declare them crazy or in some way mentally or emotionally challenged if they admitted using that kind of books to improve their life.
Isn't that sad?
I've read my first book dedicated to self-help a few years ago. It was given to me followed by the comment: "Read it and believe what you're reading." It was the time of my life when I was feeling unconfident and incompetent enough to do what, at the time, I had to do, so I had to set my priorities straight first.
At that moment, after being given that particular book, I finally thought for myself, ok, I'm in. Tell me what to do and I'll do it. I'll do anything to change what I'm feeling today. So I began reading. More importantly, I decided to believe in everything I was reading. I sad f*ck it, I believe it. I do.
I started to feel better immediately.
As soon as I started to feel better, I couldn't stop myself from thinking how dumb (because, yes, I was dumb) was I until that moment for not understanding before what I realized then.
In that book so many positive human attributes were listed and I could seriously recognize myself in them. It made me see things from the different perspective, because I've realized that I believed in those positive things being true about me the same way that, at some time in my past, I believed those negative things to be true too. So why would I ever believe bad things to be true, and not these nice ones? Why would I believe I was incompetent or inconfident enough, if, at the same time, I was brave enough to keep fighting my problems?
Why would I believe bad stuff and not the good stuff?
It was all just a matter of what I believed. Of what I still do.
At that exact moment I realized I just helped myself change. To change what, from that day on, I would believe about myself and about my happiness. Finally something was able to go through those thick layers of my insecurities and help me change my life, and it was "just one simple" book.
The book that I'm talking about is not the one that's the topic of today's post, but both of those books can seriously help you. Today I'm writing about Learn To Live: The Book That Can Change Your Life by Mats and Susan Billmark. This couple uses the examples of their own foults in life to prove us how some mistakes we make every day (and we aren't even aware of actually doing it) can seriously harm us. It's about the way we think about our duties and responsibilities, about how we treat our loved ones and about how much time we spend in bad mood when actually it's so easy to feel good.
Mats and Susan explain step by step what to do to eliminate stress from our lives by living in the present moment.
The book brings us topics as stress, anxiety, family relationships, puberty etc. We can use it as a manual whenever we need an "expert" advice or just as reminder that we're not alone in whatever it may be we feel.
The only thing we had to do to change our lives in a dramatic way is believe.
Let's try!
Rose :*
Jeste li ikada uzeli u ruku koju knjigu o samopomo�i? Jeste li mo�da na moje pitanje okrenuli o�ima jer vam ide na �ivce ta prikrivena pretpostavka da ne�to s vama nije u redu? I jo� jedno pitanje: znate li uop�e �to je to ta, u novije vrijeme svugdje prisutna, selfl-help?
Puno ljudi grozi se tog izraza i smatra da potra�iti knjige s takvom definicijom automatski zna�i proglasiti se mentalno, emocionalno ili nekako druga�ije nestabilnim. Na kraju krajeva, ako trebamo nekakvu vrstu pomo�i, o�igledno nismo sposobni neki zadatak izvr�iti sami. U ovom slu�aju, netko nam mora pomo�i �ivjeti. Koje li sramote!
Ja sam ovu vrstu literature otkrila prije nekoliko godina. Dobila sam ju uz komentar: "�itaj i vjeruj onome �to pi�e. Ionako nema� �to izgubiti osim vremena za �itanje (a svi znamo da to vrijeme nikad nije izgubljeno, tako da mi to nije trebao ni biti re�eno)." Imala sam tada nekih pote�ko�a na faksu i najprije sam trebala neke stvari rije�iti sama sa sobom. To je bio onaj trenutak kad sam rekla, okej, ja sad na sve pristajem. Recite mi �to da radim i napravit �u to, samo da stvari napokon krenu nabolje. Uzela sam tu knjigu u ruke i po�ela �itati.
Jo� va�nije, odlu�ila sam vjerovati onome �to �itam, koliko god se to �inilo glupo ili izvan svake pameti. Rekla sam je*e� sve, ja ovome vjerujem i gotovo.
Ja sam se odmah, odmah, po�ela osje�ati bolje!
�im sam primijetila da se stvarno osje�am bolje, palo mi je na pamet pitanje jesam li stvarno do sad bila toliko blesava?
U toj knjizi pisalo je toliko ohrabruju�ih stvari o ljudskim osobinama koje sam prona�la u sebi da jednostavno nije bilo mogu�e praviti se da nisu istinite. To me trgnulo jer sam zapravo shvatila koliko sam se bolje po�ela osje�ati kada sam povjerovala u pozitivne tvrdnje koje je netko o meni (jer ka�em, prepoznala sam se u tim karakteristikama) naveo. A to saznanje me natjeralo da zaklju�im sljede�e: isto tako kako sam povjerovala ovim lijepim rije�ima zbog kojih se osje�am sretnije, davno prije sam povjerovala onim (koje sam mo�da sama rekla i zamislila o sebi) negativnim koje su me natjerale da o sebi mislim lo�e.
Pa za�to bih onda vjerovala tim lo�im tvrdnjama, a ovim pozitivnima ne bih? Tko je ove lo�e proglasio autoritativnima? Za�to bi one bile opravdane, a ove druge ne bi bile?
To je bio trenutak kada sam sama sebi pomogla.
Napokon je netko (ne�to) uspio prodrijeti kroz slojeve mojeg nezadovoljstva, straha i muke i pokazao mi da ima i pozitive, ali samo ako sam ju voljna prihvatiti. To je u�inila jedna "obi�na" knjiga.
Knjiga o kojoj pri�am nije ova o kojoj vam danas pi�em, ali poanta i tematika su iste. Nau�i �ivjeti: knjiga koja ti mo�e promijeniti �ivot, knjiga je koju nam donosi Fokus, a koja �e nam ukazati na gre�ke koje svakodnevno �inimo i kojima �tetimo sami sebi, a zapravo djeluju toliko nedu�no i bezopasno da ih ni ne primje�ujemo. To je priru�nik jednog �vedskog bra�nog para koji na vlastitim primjerima i �ivotnim pogre�kama ukazuju na to kako pobolj�ati �ivotne navike da bismo eliminirali probleme kojima nam svakodnevne obaveze i zahtjevi okoline crpe �ivotnu energiju. Nau�it �emo �to u�initi da bismo se unato� svim obavezama i dalje osje�ali dobro, zdravo, motivirano, mirno i odmorno. Mats i Susan u�e nas kako �ivjeti u trenutku, potpuno i do kraja.
Neke od tema o kojima pi�u su stres, veze i problemi s djecom i tinejd�erima, a knjigu mo�emo koristiti kao priru�nik kada nam treba mi�ljenje "profesionalaca" ili kao podsjetnik da nismo jedini koji pre�ivljavamo svakojake probleme i �ivotne izazove.
Neke od tema o kojima pi�u su stres, veze i problemi s djecom i tinejd�erima, a knjigu mo�emo koristiti kao priru�nik kada nam treba mi�ljenje "profesionalaca" ili kao podsjetnik da nismo jedini koji pre�ivljavamo svakojake probleme i �ivotne izazove.
Jedino �to morate u�initi da biste zaista napravili promjenu je vjerovati onome �to pi�e i prihvatiti da se to �to pi�e zaista odnosi i na vas.
Poku�ajte.
Va�a Rose :*
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